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Post by bluemoose on Jan 27, 2011 2:43:37 GMT -5
Man that is rough. I am so glad my bf is an orphan. His parents were monsters. So many of his issues are related to his mother's abuse of drugs and alcohol while pregnant with him and then his subsequent abusive childhood. I would not meet those people in person but luckily I don't have to. Some people just aren't meant to be parents.
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Post by rarnold18 on Jan 27, 2011 16:53:01 GMT -5
Yeah, you have better self control than I do, because I probably would of escorted that little sh1t right out of my house and given her a swift kick in the pants! I understand difficult in-laws...when mine found out I was prego with son #1 after telling me congrats and that I was part of the family now she asked me if Rob was really the babies father and said "You know what they say, Momma's baby, Daddy's MAYBE!" I was crushed to say the least.... Rob's sister is no better and has been VERY judgemental about everything that we do, and she's older... she let us know that our house looked like white trash lived there (and she's a formerstripper) has blamed me for keeping my husband away from the family (when we lived literally 3 miles away from the in-laws and they never came by to see our son we had to bring him there....they went almost 9 months with out seeing him and we were less then 5 min down the road! THings for me have gotten much better with mother in law, but sister in law, well, she still looks down her nose at us, thinks she's better than us, trashy this, trashy that...always has something to say about how I'm raising our kids (rob works out of town and I'm at home alone taking care of the house and kids and yard...), how not clean our house is, about our animals, and everyhting...nothing is ever good enough and probably never will be.... all I can say is that we bought our home when we were 22 and 23, we own our 3 cars and boat (no more car notes thankgoodness), we get by and no one here doesn't get what they need...which is better than most people our age... There are just some people that will enter your life that will never be happy regardless, and you know misery loves company! I just smile and nod but one of these days I'll have a "come to Jesus" talk with her and tell her exactly what I think, how I feel and then walk away smiling!
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vkp23
Going Natural
Posts: 192
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Post by vkp23 on Jan 27, 2011 17:21:57 GMT -5
I TOTALLY feel you! I mean things with his mother were better at the beginning. We had a rough start and since my mom is bi-polar and has borderline personality disorder and wasn't being treated at the time, AND we lived with my mother, things were hard between me my mother and Thomas. We ended up at his mothers house often to fight out our problems. I mean we only dated two months before we got married. It was probably a bad idea to let his mother see us fight through feeling each other out through the stabilizing process. Then he went jobless for a while after we got our own place and things were bad there. I guess she blames me for her not raising him and not getting him prepared for real life. He didn't have a clue and fell HARD on his butt because of it. When my parents got divorced I had to grow up at a VERY young age. I had to play house wife and spent a lot of time alone having to clean house do every ones laundry and do all the cooking while my mom and brothers worked. Then I had to drop out of school and getting a high school equivalence so I could get a full time job to keep our heads above water after my brothers moved out. So I knew a lot more about life than he did. Things settled once he got a job and I got pregnant and my mother started getting proper treatment. His mother became more and more of a "B" and my mother has become a mother to him. It's almost like his mother has been sliding off her rocker over the years and she dragging his sister down with her. I mean when we got stable, we invited his sister to come stay the night with us and hang out and stuff and she said she couldn't because she would get sick and throw up from being away from her mommy.  Seriously?? Just the whole thing is stupid.  We guess his mother is hanging on to the past and still sees us as the two kids with a bumpy road ahead fighting each other the whole way, instead of the happily married successful adults that we have become. And never even once through the 8 years we've been married have we EVER been so angry as to say we didn't love each other. Even when angry we still were in love and still are to this day. She needs to quit living in the past. |
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Post by rarnold18 on Jan 27, 2011 17:40:01 GMT -5
sounds like my mom! She's a control freak and when I moved out and came to live in Florida she freaked the fudge out! She could no longer control me and she went off the deep end. My mom is a sociopath (sp?) everything is about her and if it's not she figures out a way for it to be about her, she's completely dilusional and most of the time lives in her own little happy world of butterflies and poo that smells like potpori!
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vkp23
Going Natural
Posts: 192
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Post by vkp23 on Jan 27, 2011 18:57:02 GMT -5
sounds like my mom! She's a control freak and when I moved out and came to live in Florida she freaked the fudge out! She could no longer control me and she went off the deep end. My mom is a sociopath (sp?) everything is about her and if it's not she figures out a way for it to be about her, she's completely dilusional and most of the time lives in her own little happy world of butterflies and poo that smells like potpori! LOL!!  I like that one! My mom is a little...well...special. BUT she's highly intelligent and while she's been on proper treatment she's a lot more stable. My mom has always been a wonderful person, just a little unstable. IDK what's wrong with his mother except that she's lives in a dream world where she's the only person with any kind of intelligence and any kind of decency. Isn't that called narcissistic? And I mean she picks and chooses what she wants to believe in religion. I mean, I'm Christian but I don't really care what other people believe (what ever floats your boat) But it makes me angry to NO END when people make up religions that are a mesh of all diff religions. She CLAIMS to be Christian but she adapts like Buddhism and paganism and new age atheism/science. I mean WTH ARE YOU!? Pick something and stick with it! You can't be an atheist/science believer and call yourself a Christian. WTH? Either you're Christian, Jewish, Wiccan, Buddhist, atheist or what ever. Not a mix of crap. How can ANY person say they believe one thing but also believe in all these other things? It just doesn't make sense and makes you sound like you have multiple personality disorder, and each personality has a diff religion. |
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Post by rarnold18 on Jan 27, 2011 19:57:09 GMT -5
yeah....my mom is "special" too I'm 31 and my sisters are 22 and 23. Well my mom went crazy when she hit 40 and eventually my dad left her and was awarded custody of my sisters, at the time they were 13-14 or so...welll because of her "specialness" we really don't have a relationship with her she got married and apparently got her tubes untied, and proceded to spend oodles of money on IVF instead of paying childsupport and got pregnant....oh yeah so I have a 3 year old little half brother...my mom she's 52...I was prego with my daughter at the same time my mom was prego with her son.....awesome....the kicker she didn't tell us about any of this, meaning pregnancy, tubes untied, etc...until 2 days after the kid was born! YUP! My sisters and I had no clue this was even going on.... AWESOMENESS!!! didn't care that I was going through a very difficult pregnancy or anything like that...lets just shock the hades out of a prego woman by tellingher she's got a newborn baby brother! OMFG!!!
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vkp23
Going Natural
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Post by vkp23 on Jan 27, 2011 21:35:46 GMT -5
WOW! I'm glad to know I'm not the only one with a totally F-ed up family! |
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Post by sherrylynne on Jan 27, 2011 22:12:37 GMT -5
Rose, if it hit your mother around the age of 40, she's quite likely developed schizophrenia. Not uncommon for women to become schizophrenic then. Men, it hits around age 18.
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Post by rarnold18 on Jan 27, 2011 23:02:25 GMT -5
ugh....whatever the problems is she's in denial that there is a problem, denies treating me and my sisters badly and denies that she's ever said anything derrogetory about us. I would love to have her evaluated just to see, and if there were meds that could help, it would be nice, but I've given her so many chances in the last 10 years that nothing will ever heal the things that she's said and done... she has her new family now and I hope that she's happy because she disposed of me and my sisters so that she could have it. And when I say disposed of us she did just that, even petitioned the CAtholic Church for an annulment after 22 years of marriage and 3 kids, she had to sign and have noterized a statement that she never wanted nor intended to have children, in order to get that annulment, and, the Boston Archdiosis granted her her annulment and bastardized me and my sisters.... I know that schizophrenia can be genetic, if it is that, I just hope that I don't end up with it...it's been my goal to be a better mother to my kids than my mother was to me and the girls....I don't even want to hurt my children the way she did us....
yeah, f'ed up isn't even the word for it
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Post by sherrylynne on Jan 27, 2011 23:07:25 GMT -5
I hope it isn't, as well.
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